Stumble Through

POSTED: Jan 24.09

We’re doing another stumble through this morning. I like to do these because it gives me a chance to see the arc of my character and of the whole play which you can’t get when you’re rehearsing scenes out of order. I am fairly confident of my lines now with the exception of the final scene in Act One where all the characters come onstage and have individual lines interspersed, and sometimes spoken simultaneously. It is stylized and I sense it can be effective and theatrical but right now it’s challenging to learn how it all goes together.

For some reason, I love having to learn the technical stuff—what to do with props, how to get on and off stage, even the learning lines. Maybe because these are safer than the parts that require emotional exposure.

Wouldn’t you think that after fifty years I would have more confidence? But in some ways, it’s just the opposite. More is expected of me and I expect more of myself.

* * * * * *

The stumble through did not go well, in my opinion…not for me. I feel very low right now. Very much wondering why I am in this profession. Very much wishing I could disappear to my ranch and never come out. I feel at a loss as to what to do about it. Maybe a good night’s sleep will help. For the first time in my life, I am having trouble sleeping through the night.

See you next time.

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7 Responses to “Stumble Through”

Lisa Stone says:

February 2, 2009 at 11:40 pm

I admire this post, Jane. Thank you for blogging the very real insecurities that I think many people feel when they plan a huge, public endeavor. I don’t know many women headlining Broadway shows (okay, none). But I speak daily with talented writers who doubt themselves and, yes, lose sleep over their work, even as their words change lives all over the Internet. I think knowing that someone of your accomplishments feels this way too is quite a gift. Thank you!

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Type On, Golden Blogger: Reading Jane Fonda’s Web Journal - ArtsBeat Blog - NYTimes.com says:

February 3, 2009 at 2:14 pm

[...] come onstage and have individual lines interspersed, and sometimes spoken simultaneously,” she wrote in a posting on Jan. 24. “It is stylized and I sense it can be effective and theatrical but right now it’s challenging [...]

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michael sanabria says:

February 3, 2009 at 2:38 pm

Seeing you fine tuning your chops on stage and maintaining your blog daily …….. wow !! What Energy !!!

It is why I think you are still sooooooo hot !! I hope to see you on stage still when i return from Yucatan, Mexico in March. And if not, where will you be ????????

An admirer since the 80’s !

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Diane says:

February 3, 2009 at 3:14 pm

Why do we fall? So we can get back up.

As a stage manager, I enjoy/dislike stumble thrus. You see where you are, where you have to go, and what you have to do to get there.

Break many legs Jane!

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james says:

February 4, 2009 at 2:50 am

it’s all a part of the experience itself, isn’t it? we must love the ultimate highs, the praise, the feeling of accomplishment in addition to the lows, the self-doubt, the occasional feelings of depletion… all these sensations somehow inform each other, thank you for your candor.

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Sandro says:

March 8, 2009 at 9:55 am

Hi Jane!Loving your blog and thank you for this post. I’m also going through a period in my life where I wonder if I’m in the right track… I’m a student and I’m always doubting myself and uncertain of what the future holds for me.
Reading that you also feel insecure about your abilities made me realize that we’re all alike… I’m 25, you’re 71, I’m still a student, you’re a 2 time Oscar winning actress… but we (the millions who live in this tiny planet) go through the same stuff.

Okay, time to finish! I have to tell you that being a young man… reading your book was truly enlightining!I adore you ever more and I have a great respect for you and your life!
Soldier on Jane! Good luck with your play!

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sarah says:

June 18, 2009 at 2:31 pm

where is the ranch where you’d like to retreat?

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